The Week From Hell

Man. Quarter system. I've got to say, quarter system seriously leaves me hanging. I wonder who created the idea of jam-packing a full semester's worth of material into 10 weeks. Somebody clearly masochistic. Once you hit around Week 5, all hell starts to break loose.

Which, honestly, is the reason for my absence the past week. Reading about my constant forays into the library probably isn't very interesting. Actually, I can tell you for a fact it is quite boring. Much more boring than water-rafting down a waterfall in the Amazon, for instance. And then, on Saturday I proctored the LSAT. Whew, talk about being glad I was sitting on the other side of the table. Watching those poor future-law-students slink into the classroom, hunch behind a desk and whittle down their pencils to mere stubs...its depressing.

Wah, its all depressing. I feel like Holden Caulfield calling everything a phony. The weather's depressing, Week 5 and 6's constant pressure of work is depressing, the tree stump in the yard across the street from me is depressing. I just want it to be Spring and Summer already, where we can run off to the beach and lay in the sand, soaking up the sun. Or at least walk outside without wanting to hang yourself. Looking at the pictures of me bouncing around Spain like a bag of sunshine isn't helping either. Wa, wa, wa.

Well, at least to counteract the rainy-day-blues, I've been trying to do some fun things. Most notably, hosting the VIP Lounge PreParty in the ultra-superior upstairs lounge (also known as my attic room, but you know.)

Hollywood starlets preparing for the Red Carpet.

I must say, that was a nice blowing off of steam and a much needed break. After the LSAT on Saturday, I attended the Kappa Kappa Gamma Winter Formal with, who else? My awesomer than awesome broski, who looked super fly in his shades.

We most certainly got our dance on.

It was a little bit of a slow start (there was something going on with the buses, and half of the girls were two hours late!) but it got hoppin' pretty quick after everyone finally arrived. I've gotta say, my bro can break it down!!

After that, a much needed restful weekend to start it all again this lovely Monday. Speaking of -- I have to get to class! See you on the flip side ;)

K

maybe this time.

i wish the world was flat like the old days
so i could travel just by folding a map
no more airplanes, or steam trains or freeways
there'd be no distance that could hold us back.

The In-Between

Just uploaded a couple of pictures from the final days of Alicante that I forgot that I had taken.

I say that I wish I had taken more pictures, but, honestly? I took so many. Besides, when you're there you never feel like it is going to go away. How many times do we take pictures of our everyday lives? Of us simply just living in our homes, cooking, cleaning, driving to work, all of it. We only take pictures on the "special occasions", the times when something is supposedly Important. Well, I don't. The pictures I always love the most are the ones of everyday things.

Anyways, most of these things happened within the last month, but here's a bit of a photo post to wrap up January.

This is my house! Its all Christmas-ified. :) I've lived here since I was 11.


My mom running through the rain. I don't know why I like this picture, but it makes me laugh. I think because its a really natural smile -- its hard to catch on film for her.


Going to see Avatar with my SCU friends at midnight! Aww, I missed them!


Making pancakes at 2am because we are hungry. And everyone has the same paper to write and we sat in my room and sortof wrote them. And then decided pancakes were much more fun than homework.

Partyy. More to come! :)

Re: National Novel Writing Month

A couple of people have asked me lately, "So, what's going on with your novel?"

To which I respond: "What novel? Oh, you mean that writhing, putrid sack of syllables that likes to sit in the corner of my desk and stare at me with angry eyes and pointed teeth? The one that's the slight green of moldy bread, and reeks of pickle juice and bile? Oh, that. Right. I'm working on it."

After which they tend to back away slowly.

But, after a month or two of shoving it in the back of my closet and ignoring its existence, the smell of rotting meat and decaying vowels is beginning to bother me, so I pulled it out to whip it into shape. And, surprise! Beneath the seven layers of dust, there are a few redeeming qualities to it. So, I'm planning on rolling up my sleeves and giving her a whirl, seeing if I can clean the disease out of this thing and find the soul. It has to be there somewhere, right? Right?

Perhaps.

Never mind that I have five classes, plus a volunteer placement, a ten-hour workweek and an independent study project. Forget that I might, you know, have other things to do. Somewhere in between all of that, right?

Well, here's your sneak peak. I uploaded the very beginning of (what-is-now) Chapter One. Its a little rough, but let me know what you think.

Okay -- back to work. See you on the flip side!

Transitions

It is impossible to believe that I was living in Spain a little over a month ago. Every day that slips by is another day further away from that place, from that impossibility. It almost feels as if it doesn't exist, as if those months were just a dream and now I've woken up back into reality. But I can't discern sleep from dreaming. Which life is real?

I almost can't look back at the pictures of Spain -- it is just too painful. I think it will be a long time before I will be able to. Isn't that funny? Almost the way you can't look at photos of a person when they are gone, because you know that they aren't coming back. That's exactly how I feel.

There is nothing bad about my life back here at home. It is perfectly normal. Perfectly fine. And yet, for some reason, I honestly want to just crawl into my bed sometimes and lay there, hoping against hope that when I open up my eyes I will be in my tiny room in Alicante, staring at the ancient ceiling. As if it were that easy to switch between the two places, my two lives. It doesn't help that it is raining here every day. I love the rain, but...

I'm working on it. I'm learning a lot and focusing on my work, hoping just to get through. I'm trying to put meaning back into my life, figuring out how to incorporate everything and all of these pieces into one, tightly-knit thing. And though I can knit a scarf pretty well, knitting all of these pieces together is proving a little more challenging than I realized. After reading my friend Trevor's blog though (who is still in Spain and just got back from a month of traveling Europe), I just have to remember to make the most of every moment. Okay, maybe there isn't quite the same amount of adventure here at SC. But there's got to be something. And, well, I cooked again tonight, so I suppose that's an adventure. Simply navigating, that's an adventure.

I'm tired of 'transitioning' now. I want home to feel like home again.